Precious Heart - Broken Heart

PreciousHeart-BrokenHeart

Paperback ISBN 9781434391438 $16.50
Hardcover ISBN 9781434391445 $20.50

More than a chronicle, I walk you through an actual description of the
unique pain of divorce in contrast with the pain encountered during bereavement.
I begin and end with love.

Michael G. Maness, 1995

See Divorce Archive for more resources on divorce

Part 1: Clockwork--Need for Expression

I. The Beginning <<< See the First Chapter -- Buy the Book
I Loved Her
Crash & Doubt
Pendulums of Pain & of Hope

II. How Will Healing Come?
1. The Mainspring of Expression
--Fig. 1: Healing Clockwork
2. My Expression
3. Caution About Expression
4. The Length of Healing
5. Formula for Healing

Part 2: Black Forest Pathway-- How Expression Unfolds

III. What Does Love Have To Do with Divorce?
1. What Is Love?
2. We Fell in Love
     --What Kind of Wanderer   poem by author
3. What Kind of Love Can Survive Divorce?
     --Fig. 2: Struggle with the SHOCK of a BrokenHeart
4. How Broken Is My Heart?

IV. Can My Faith Survive?
1. The Judgment Seat
2. A Passing Biblical Overview
3. The Exact Point of Exposition
4. Divorce & Christian Compassion

V. Just What Is a Divorce?
1. A Tragic Reality of the Times
2. The Definition of Divorce
3. Forces of Conflict that War Against Love
4. A Primer on the Pre-Divorce Stage

VI. Why Do I Have Such Trouble?
1. Love Is Naturally Committed
2. The Ethical Dilemma of Justifying Any Divorce
3. The Pre-Divorce Stage: A Mortally Wounded Soul
     --Fig. 3: Struggle with FINALITY in a BrokenHeart
4. A Primer on the Shock Stage
5. Love Does Not Let Go Easily
6. The Differences Between True Love & Obsession

VII. What Do I Do with the “SHOCK” of It All?
1. Find a "Credentialed" Confidant
2. Do Not Be Rushed
3. See the Tragedy as Tragedy
4. Know that "Time" Is Irrelevant
5. Note the Permanent Scar
6. Take the Challenge of Growth

VIII. What Does It Feel Like To Be in a WASTELAND?
1. Let Those Who Know Be Kind
2. Shock Stage: "Is This Really Happening to Me?"
3. The Wasteland: A New Beginning, A New Pain
     --The Wasteland   poem by author
4. Finding Direction in the Wasteland
5. Rejection: The Loneliest Hour
     --Loneliness   poem by author

IX. What Is the Nature of Grief?
1. Grief: Universal & Unique
2. Two Tasks of Grief:
1. Identifying Needs/Binding Ties,
2. Loosening Ties
3. Grief Task 1: Finding Needs, The Binding Ties
4. Grief Task 2: Setting Free, Loosening the Binding Ties
5. The Healing Forces of Self-Discovery & Expression

X. Intermission: The Bay of Heart-Brokenness

XI. Grief Task 1: What Needs & Binding Ties?
1. Identifying the Needs: the Binding Ties
2. Discovering the Self & Frailties
3. Running From Grief:  Judas & Other Forms of Running
4. Love & Forgiveness
     --Lovelorn   poem by author
5. Toward a Higher Level of Loving

XII. Grief Task 2: How Do You Loosen the Binding Ties?
1. Bridge of Finality: What Delays the Approach
2. Bridge of Finality: Successful Navigation
3. Bridge of Finality: Arrival
4. True Healing Begins Here
     --Fig. 4: FULL Struggle of a BrokenHeart
     --Hope-Trip ... of a Broken Heart   poem by author

Part Three: Black Forest--What Helps Expression

XIII. What Factors Inform Us About Binding Ties?
Intro: finding What the Departed Meant To Us
1. First Factor: Our World Experiences of Losses in General
2.  Second Factor:   How Many Experiences Were Shared
3. Third Factor:   Our Ability to Love and Receive Love

XIV. What Is Unique in the Pains of Death & Divorce?
The Unique Pain of Divorce
The Unique Pain of Death
       --The Dirge   poem by author

XV. How Do the Pains of Death & Divorce Compare?
Intro: Finality Makes Divorce More Painful
Intro: Do We Minimize Death--Not in the Least
1. Death Is Natural ... Divorce is a Broken Dream
2. Death Is a Religious Value ... Divorce Is a Religious Taboo
3. Death Has Funerals ... Divorce Usually Divides
4. Death Often Immortalizes ... Divorce Often Distorts
5. Death Removes the Loved ... Divorce Changes the Love

Table of Contents

Part 1: Clockwork--Need for Expression

I. The Beginning <<< See the First Chapter -- Buy the Book
I Loved Her
Crash & Doubt
Pendulums of Pain & of Hope

II. How Will Healing Come?
1. The Mainspring of Expression
--Fig. 1: Healing Clockwork
2. My Expression
3. Caution About Expression
4. The Length of Healing
5. Formula for Healing

Part 2: Black Forest Pathway-- How Expression Unfolds

III. What Does Love Have To Do with Divorce?
1. What Is Love?
2. We Fell in Love
     --What Kind of Wanderer   poem by author
3. What Kind of Love Can Survive Divorce?
     --Fig. 2: Struggle with the SHOCK of a BrokenHeart
4. How Broken Is My Heart?

IV. Can My Faith Survive?
1. The Judgment Seat
2. A Passing Biblical Overview
3. The Exact Point of Exposition
4. Divorce & Christian Compassion

V. Just What Is a Divorce?
1. A Tragic Reality of the Times
2. The Definition of Divorce
3. Forces of Conflict that War Against Love
4. A Primer on the Pre-Divorce Stage

VII. What Do I Do with the “SHOCK” of It All?
1. Find a "Credentialed" Confidant
2. Do Not Be Rushed
3. See the Tragedy as Tragedy
4. Know that "Time" Is Irrelevant
5. Note the Permanent Scar
6. Take the Challenge of Growth

IX. What Is the Nature of Grief?
1. Grief: Universal & Unique
2. Two Tasks of Grief:
1. Identifying Needs/Binding Ties,
2. Loosening Ties
3. Grief Task 1: Finding Needs, The Binding Ties
4. Grief Task 2: Setting Free, Loosening the Binding Ties
5. The Healing Forces of Self-Discovery & Expression

X. Intermission: The Bay of Heart-Brokenness

XI. Grief Task 1: What Needs & Binding Ties?
1. Identifying the Needs: the Binding Ties
2. Discovering the Self & Frailties
3. Running From Grief:  Judas & Other Forms of Running
4. Love & Forgiveness
     --Lovelorn   poem by author
5. Toward a Higher Level of Loving

Part Three: Black Forest--What Helps Expression

XIII. What Factors Inform Us About Binding Ties?
Intro: finding What the Departed Meant To Us
1. First Factor: Our World Experiences of Losses in General
2.  Second Factor:   How Many Experiences Were Shared
3. Third Factor:   Our Ability to Love and Receive Love

XIV. What Is Unique in the Pains of Death & Divorce?
The Unique Pain of Divorce
The Unique Pain of Death
       --The Dirge   poem by author

XVI. Is There an END?

--Beyond the Black Oakwood Door poem by author

Selected Reading

Poems by the Author in Order of Appearance

What Kind of Wanderer

The Wasteland

Loneliness

Lovelorn

Hope-Trip...of a Broken Heart

The Dirge

Beyond the Black Oakwood Door

Table of Contents

Part 1: Clockwork--Need for Expression

I. The Beginning <<< See the First Chapter -- Buy the Book I Loved Her Crash & Doubt Pendulums of Pain & of Hope

II. How Will Healing Come? 1. The Mainspring of Expression --Fig. 1: Healing Clockwork 2. My Expression 3. Caution About Expression 4. The Length of Healing 5. Formula for Healing

Part 2: Black Forest Pathway-- How Expression Unfolds

III. What Does Love Have To Do with Divorce? 1. What Is Love? 2. We Fell in Love --What Kind of Wanderer poem by author 3. What Kind of Love Can Survive Divorce? --Fig. 2: Struggle with the SHOCK of a BrokenHeart 4. How Broken Is My Heart?

IV. Can My Faith Survive? 1. The Judgment Seat 2. A Passing Biblical Overview 3. The Exact Point of Exposition 4. Divorce & Christian Compassion

V. Just What Is a Divorce? 1. A Tragic Reality of the Times 2. The Definition of Divorce 3. Forces of Conflict that War Against Love 4. A Primer on the Pre-Divorce Stage

VII. What Do I Do with the “SHOCK” of It All? 1. Find a "Credentialed" Confidant 2. Do Not Be Rushed 3. See the Tragedy as Tragedy 4. Know that "Time" Is Irrelevant 5. Note the Permanent Scar 6. Take the Challenge of Growth

IX. What Is the Nature of Grief? 1. Grief: Universal & Unique 2. Two Tasks of Grief: 1. Identifying Needs/Binding Ties, 2. Loosening Ties 3. Grief Task 1: Finding Needs, The Binding Ties 4. Grief Task 2: Setting Free, Loosening the Binding Ties 5. The Healing Forces of Self-Discovery & Expression

X. Intermission: The Bay of Heart-Brokenness

XI. Grief Task 1: What Needs & Binding Ties? 1. Identifying the Needs: the Binding Ties 2. Discovering the Self & Frailties 3. Running From Grief: Judas & Other Forms of Running 4. Love & Forgiveness --Lovelorn poem by author 5. Toward a Higher Level of Loving

XII. Grief Task 2: How Do You Loosen the Binding Ties? 1. Bridge of Finality: What Delays the Approach 2. Bridge of Finality: Successful Navigation 3. Bridge of Finality: Arrival 4. True Healing Begins Here --Fig. 4: FULL Struggle of a BrokenHeart --Hope-Trip ... of a Broken Heart poem by author

Part Three: Black Forest--What Helps Expression

XIII. What Factors Inform Us About Binding Ties? Intro: finding What the Departed Meant To Us 1. First Factor: Our World Experiences of Losses in General 2. Second Factor: How Many Experiences Were Shared 3. Third Factor: Our Ability to Love and Receive Love

XIV. What Is Unique in the Pains of Death & Divorce? The Unique Pain of Divorce The Unique Pain of Death --The Dirge poem by author

XVI. Is There an END?

--Beyond the Black Oakwood Door poem by author

Poems by the Author in Order of Appearance

I. The Beginning <<< See the First Chapter -- Buy the Book
I Loved Her
Crash & Doubt
Pendulums of Pain & of Hope

II. How Will Healing Come?
1. The Mainspring of Expression
--Fig. 1: Healing Clockwork
2. My Expression
3. Caution About Expression
4. The Length of Healing
5. Formula for Healing

III. What Does Love Have To Do with Divorce?
1. What Is Love?
2. We Fell in Love
--What Kind of Wanderer poem by author
3. What Kind of Love Can Survive Divorce?
--Fig. 2: Struggle with the SHOCK of a BrokenHeart
4. How Broken Is My Heart?

IV. Can My Faith Survive?
1. The Judgment Seat
2. A Passing Biblical Overview
3. The Exact Point of Exposition
4. Divorce & Christian Compassion

V. Just What Is a Divorce?
1. A Tragic Reality of the Times
2. The Definition of Divorce
3. Forces of Conflict that War Against Love
4. A Primer on the Pre-Divorce Stage

VII. What Do I Do with the “SHOCK” of It All?
1. Find a "Credentialed" Confidant
2. Do Not Be Rushed
3. See the Tragedy as Tragedy
4. Know that "Time" Is Irrelevant
5. Note the Permanent Scar
6. Take the Challenge of Growth

IX. What Is the Nature of Grief?
1. Grief: Universal & Unique
2. Two Tasks of Grief:
1. Identifying Needs/Binding Ties,
2. Loosening Ties
3. Grief Task 1: Finding Needs, The Binding Ties
4. Grief Task 2: Setting Free, Loosening the Binding Ties
5. The Healing Forces of Self-Discovery & Expression

XI. Grief Task 1: What Needs & Binding Ties?
1. Identifying the Needs: the Binding Ties
2. Discovering the Self & Frailties
3. Running From Grief: Judas & Other Forms of Running
4. Love & Forgiveness
--Lovelorn poem by author
5. Toward a Higher Level of Loving

XII. Grief Task 2: How Do You Loosen the Binding Ties?
1. Bridge of Finality: What Delays the Approach
2. Bridge of Finality: Successful Navigation
3. Bridge of Finality: Arrival
4. True Healing Begins Here
--Fig. 4: FULL Struggle of a BrokenHeart
--Hope-Trip ... of a Broken Heart poem by author

XIII. What Factors Inform Us About Binding Ties?
Intro: finding What the Departed Meant To Us
1. First Factor: Our World Experiences of Losses in General
2. Second Factor: How Many Experiences Were Shared
3. Third Factor: Our Ability to Love and Receive Love

XIV. What Is Unique in the Pains of Death & Divorce?
The Unique Pain of Divorce
The Unique Pain of Death
--The Dirge poem by author